POLING: Fighting the puzzle of toy packaging | Local news

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Remember those Christmases when all you had to worry about with a kid’s toy was putting it together?

Now the real fight is to free the toy from its packaging.

With their combinations of taped, twisted and then knotted and then twisted boxes of other plastic-coated threads, vacuum-sealed plastic film, staples and, in some cases, a dial that has to be twisted, pulled and turned simultaneously that resembles the Both to a bank safe and a particularly tough child-resistant cap on a medicine bottle, these toy wrappers are like the old riddle shrouded in mystery covered in riddle.

In some ways, this toy wrapper reminds me of an obscure puzzle piece from a book like “The Da Vinci Code” or another thriller.

One wrong move and the toy’s head may jump.

Or the more you twist the wiring that ties Barbie together better than the chains holding King Kong, the more it becomes a tangled knot.

Once you understand, analyze, and deduce how to successfully navigate your way through the package obstacle course series, instead of learning a great mystery from history, you have successfully freed a Plastic Transformer .

Still, opening the wrapper can be more nerve-racking than James Bond sweating a bombshell.

As you try to figure out this bundle more and more toys and their bundles pile up beside you as a group of children zoned because of too many chocolate and marshmallow stocking stuffers threaten a full-scale riot next to your recliner.

Twist a bad thread and the whole family could descend into anarchy right in front of Grandma and the ceramic crib.

If you have children, and it’s Christmas, alas, you know there is little exaggeration in these words. Still, I don’t know why the toys are now so packed.

Maybe it’s to protect them from shoplifters. I imagine if someone wants them, they’ll steal the entire package and open it later and somewhere later.

Maybe it’s to protect children’s toys who might otherwise play with merchandise in the aisles of the store and then put them back damaged on the shelves.

I do not know.

Maybe this is just a way of tormenting parents. Maybe the wrapping is an immediate little punishment for spoiling your kids this Christmas.

I considered returning the wrapper to the kids and saying with great enthusiasm, “Oh! Looooook! Your toy is inside this neat and fished game! It says here, stand back, you don’t need to read this, it says, “Test your skills!” Are you as nimble as Spider-Man? Are you as strong as Superman? Do you have Batman’s detective abilities? Can you do it? Can you free your toy? “

I thought of taking on such a challenge as if it was part of the packaging. Embark the kids on marketing-packaging adventures and then let them become all the more capable as I settle down more wisely in my deckchair with some chocolate-marshmallow Santa Claus for breakfast …

Dream, mate! Who am I kidding?

Such a statement would run up against the faces of cold and silent children, followed by a revolt of frustration and grim despair as they grapple with the packages. This is no way for a child to experience Christmas.

No, this is how a parent should experience Christmas.

Merry Christmas!

Dean Poling is editor of the Valdosta Daily Times.


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